Wifely Duties

No, I don’t mean that. Us progressive ladies and our progressive hubbies/partners had better not think of that as a duty.

I’m talking about a few things I recently started doing that really Hubby should do for himself, and I’ve resisted until this point in our relationship because they seem so over-the-line wifely.

But when I resolved to start sweating the small stuff, I realized that waiting wasn’t going to help. At 35 he wasn’t suddenly going to start doing these things on his own. And so, I stepped in.

I now (gulp) pack my husband’s lunch, and sort his laundry.

In Cordova, Hubby worked at home, his office was upstairs. It just didn’t seem too weird to make enough lunch for two whenever I was hungry, and then shout up to him that food was ready. But here of course, he goes off to school everyday, without breakfast (he’s never been a morning eater) and doesn’t get home until 4:30. He either starves all day, or goes and buys lunch. Which at $10 a pop, adds up.

Here is a man who can barely summon the patience to pour granola into a bowl and top with milk. He was simply never going to start thinking ahead to make himself lunch.

To make the concept of packing my husband’s lunch swallowable, I am just making an effort to always cook extra dinner. Then I put the leftovers in a tupperware. All that’s normal enough. Then I just have to remember to set said tupp by the backdoor in the morning, with a utensil on top (morning’s are not his strong point).

$10 saved.

Now, the laundry. Here’s a question that’s always bugged me. Do ‘normal’ people wash their clothes after each wear? I notice they don’t wear the same clothes day after day, like I do…. So unless they’re washing them after each and every wear, what do they do with the half dirty clothes???? I mean, really I’d like to know. Because I just don’t think that ‘normal’ people have a pile on their floor that they sift through every morning for the fresher items.

My tack is, as stated, just wear the clothes. Day in and day out until they’re dirty (which for me, means quite some time). Hubby likes to change his clothes more or less every day, but will certainly accept that they’re not necessarily in need of a wash after every wear. T-shirts and undies, yes. Jeans and sweaters, no. But although he’s stellar at making The Pile, he doesn’t sift through to find a freshy, he just gets a new item off the shelf. The shelf of clothes that I have carried to the back shed, washed, hung to dry, carried back in, and folded.

He does do some of the laundry, I ought to clarify. But anyway, this is not a bitch-about-your-husband blog. The point here is that, aside from my energy, that’s a lot of wasted water, detergent and electricity washing clothes that aren’t really even dirty!

So I decided to bite the bullet and start sifting for him. Don’t ask me why this in particular was the hurdle, and not washing his clothes in the first place, but it was. Of course it takes less of my time in the long run. I pick out the pants and sweaters, check that they don’t have big spills on them (we do, after all, have kids, and he is, after all, in law school, to which some people suits). Then I fold them back up, return them to the shelf, and wash the rest.

That’s it! Easy! Money saved, energy saved, evil circumvented!

5 thoughts on “Wifely Duties

  1. “”Because I just don’t think that ‘normal’ people have a pile on their floor that they sift through every morning for the fresher items”” You don’t have a teenager in your house then! ;-D hahah! x

  2. “Because I just don’t think that ‘normal’ people have a pile on their floor that they sift through every morning for the fresher items.”
    Not on the floor but over a chair I do. I’d rather have them over an airing rack so they got some air through them when I wasn’t wearing them. But I don’t own one.
    Maybe if your husband had something to drape his clothes over (something closer to hand than the wardrobe/cupboard) he might aim for that first?
    I usually have enough clothes for 2-3 outfits on the go. Slouchy around the house clothes and then some worky neater-looking clothes. Things come and go from the pile as and when.
    I just found your blog through a forum called Down to Earth, and I’m really enjoying your writing. Thanks :-)

  3. HA ha, found you thorugh DTE and I also am enjoying your writing.

    Your right ,I dont get fresh clothes each time and on the rare occasions I am at home I wear the same ones each tme.

    My OH also just throuws his on the floor and we just dont have room for something like a chair in the bed room, it just wouldnt work. I have a drawer that I use for clothes which have been worn, but are clean and I get most of my clothes from that for day to day wear.

    I refused to pick my OHs clothes up for months, but then he suddenly put them into the laundry basket and the sight of it made me feel sick.

    I made him do the laundry, but then he just forgets and it sits there with all my clothes underneath. So I turfed it all out and I just wash mine. It is an ongoing battle. And I dont like it



  4. Ha, this is so like us! Dave doesn’t eat breakfast- it would deprive him of an extra 3 minutes in bed! I even poured his cereal and brought it to him as he was getting dressed for a while. He says no thanks if I offer, but perhaps I’ll just go back to doing it without asking- at least he eats it.

    And I’m up anyway, in the kitchen, making him a sandwich to take for lunch. I’ve tried to send him leftovers, and a fork, but apparently the smell of heated lunch is embarrasing for him, in the office. (!) So, it’s a meat and cheese and salad sandwich on toasted bread every single day. I die a little bit from the boredom of making them, but he’s happy, and we save so much money! Not just the cost of the lunch, but then because he doesn’t have coins in his pocket, change from buying lunch, he doesn’t bother to get the coffee or the magazine or whatever, at the train station on the way home.

    Laundry is funny. It’s my favourite chore, but I wont wash anything he hasn’t put in the hamper, and I won’t iron. So, his workshirts get nicely hung while wet, on hangers, and put away when dry, and he wears them just a little bit wrinkly. And he looks carefully for a less wrinkly one if he has an important meeting that day. Occasionally I pick up the mound of (dirty?) clothes from the floor on his side of the bed, and shove them in his wardrobe. He’s pretty good at rewearing stuff, though.

    I am always gutted when my jeans or skirt finally need to go in the wash, but with baby sicking on me all the time I’m often going thru 3 or 4 tops a day. Just have to laugh.

  5. I finally – more or less – solved the pile on the floor problem last year. I now have hooks handing over my bedroom door and on the outside of my cupboard door to hang the cleanish clothes on. For the kids, they each have a wire basket drawer to put their cleanish clothes back into – they still have a strong tendency towards dropping them on the floor though. And the older one also tends to get clean clothes out instead of going to that drawer, while the younger has been known to carefully put her clean clothes away in the dirty clones drawer! But it’s an improvement over all.

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